It's a New Day Dawning

It seems with each new Thanksgiving that dawns, I am more able to get past THE ONE..that one we like to not remember ..the one were my husband died. But it did happen so I will state it here and go on. The thanksgiving of 2008, I woke up from a nap to find my husband, Dan  Joseph Holloway, face down on the floor. Dead of a massive heart attack.
After a marriage of 40 years, it has been a long 7 years learning to live by myself.  Like most widows will tell you, the worst part is night. Getting ready for bed seems to still present a struggle for me. Am I really ready for bed or am I setting myself up for a long night of rambling thoughts.

Changing into my night clothes and telling myself it is ok to climb under, my cold covers is where I start the process. Prior to that night 7 years ago, Dan usually was in bed just before me so that the bed was warm and cozy. In addition to that is the question of..am I ready for sleep. Again, prior to this date, if I was not quit ready to enter into the world of sleep, I could always count on one of us talking the other one into a dull conversation that would lull us into the land of nod. Not so now that I depend solely on myself and my wandering thoughts to  "think" myself into sleep. This sometimes takes awhile so now a days, I try to really be ready for sleep before sliding under the blankets. It seems to help if I eat a warm snack of nicely buttered toast with honey..lol

That said, some of the things I think about Thanksgivings past are the various foods my relatives used to bring to the feast. Of coarse the food channel can make my mouth water with all the decadent dishes that are shown in all the proper settings. The other day their was a segment on the proper way to make Parker House Rolls. It immediately reminded me of my childhood holidays in my home in Kansas City.

It was my mother who always made the rolls. I am not sure where she got the recipe, but it seems it must have magically changed every year. We never were sure how they would turn out. Sometimes they forgot to rise and so we took them out in the back yard were we kids used them for slingshot rocks. Other times for whatever reason, they tasted like chalk and we quietly slid them into the dog bowl outside. Of course there were enough good seasons were they turned out perfect that we cheered my mother on to bake another year...All in all, baking was not her strong suit..that was left to my grandmother.

When I think of all the things to be thankful for this year, there are many. First and foremost are my children, grandchildren and now my two great grandchildren ...am I getting old or what?? Life is full when there are so many friends and relatives. I also am thankful for the health of us all. I came through a season where I was hospitalized several times and then the sudden birth of our little Opie born at 33 weeks. He is doing good now and coming along nicely. Of coarse we are always thankful every year that our beautiful Moriah is still with us. Every scan that comes back cancer free reminds us of what a wonder God we have.

This year I have been given the responsibility of leading a life group for our church. As a self proclaimed homebody, I was not sure I could do it. But the Lord knows each of so well. He dropped this in my lap and I was so afraid I would mess it up. It has truly been one of the best things I have been thankful for this year. This group of ladies has taught me so much. They are simply delightful and I have been so blessed by their presence in my life.

So this year I want to say "thank you" Lord for a wonderful year of new beginnings and a special acknowledgement that He is the same, yesterday, today and forever.

Have a wonderful and blessed holiday season!