If my husband had lived, two days ago would have been my 42nd anniversary. I used to forget what the exact date of our anniversary was and Dan would have to remind me. Now that he is gone, I seem to automatically remember it...I remember a lot of things now.
When we first got married, there were those who predicted that our marriage wouldn't last. They were almost right..our marriage could have failed on many occasions. But not for the reasons that our friends first thought. When we met, he was the song leader at camp and I was a camp counselor. His overtly gregraious personality appeared to be way overpowering next to my calm, quite exterior. It was because of this obvious difference that many a prediction was voiced that we were doomed as man and wife.
For the most part, it was the Air Force that saved our marriage over those first years. (Being unable to run home to "mama" when things got bad was a blessing in disguise.) The draft was on going in the 60's and Dan left to go over seas, three weeks after we were married. Being only a "one stripper," he was not allowed to take a wife with him. Young love and it's ability to overcome, cannot be overstated. After I found out that his boss would allow a wife to visit for a few weeks, I quickly saved the money to catch a flight to join my new husband. Soon I was on my way to join him in the squalid little town of Happy Valley in Goose Bay, Canada.
Coming from a long line of Gypsy, survival stock and being a 20 year old, extremely naive bride, I packed my bags with house hold goods and used my clothing as padding. (In 1968, airline baggage criteria was much more lenient.) In the back of my mind was the idea that I was going to pay a one way ticket and somehow find a way to stay there until my new groom could accompany me home...in two years. (This details of this adventure is for a future novel still in the gray matter of this author.)
Looking back to that time from the stand point of where I stand now, I can see why my poor mother was in so much distress at the thought of her oldest daughter traipsing off to parts unknown. The war was on and even though I wasn't going to a war zone, I would be out of her sight...and her protection. Being raised just outside Kansas City, most of my life, I had been protected from the ugly side of life. Add to that, the fact that I had never flown in a plane or even been to an airport, I was very much about to be in way over my head. I was about to be stretched..really, really stretched.
Philippians 4:13 says, I can do everything through him who gives me strength. Up to that time, my past 20 years at home had been a stretching experience..although I thought it was just normal life. Little did I know that the previous years of struggle, would be the foundation that would see me through the next 60+ years.
At the beginning of this year, the Lord told me I had grieved long enough and that it was now time for me to do some stretching. I am not sure what all that may be involved, but having had many times of stretching over my life, I know it always means reaching out from inside myself to a place beyond my normal limits.
Many things have happened over the last two years since Dan's death. For the most part, I was blessed not to have had to reach out or strain my emotions anymore than I wanted to. But even at my age, it seems I have some growing to do...and so, once again, I will trust in the Lord from where my strength comes from...when the Lord requires me to do some more stretching, I have learned it is for His honor and glory. My life is not yet over...its stretching time again..
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Friday, February 11, 2011
Great Anticipation
Yesterday we had almost a foot of snow here in Heber Springs. According to the media, it was almost a year ago today that our fair state had another large snow. I guess February in Arkansas is the snow month.
As a child living in Kansas, I used to love the night before a big snow. The smell of snow in the air, forecast frosty, white flakes of whimsical enchantment. Knowing that school would be let out the next day just added to the excitement. That feeling of childhood wonderment was relived this week as the grandchildren gathered around the TV...listening to the weather man tell which counties would be getting enough snow to guarantee the dismissal of classes the next day.
Recently, I felt that same feeling of anticipation. I was reading a book about near death experiences. Story after story was told about those who had been ushered through what they thought to be the gates of heaven. Each experience was different of course, but in many ways very much the same. Often friends or relatives came to meet the almost dying person and showed them different things that had held real meaning. After a short tour, each person was then told it was not their time and they must return to planet earth.
As I read, I recalled the death of my husband Dan. Before he died, we had often kidded each other about what kind of house we wanted prepared before the other arrived. I had ordered a cabin with large windows that opened out to the ocean. My husband had many good qualities, but construction was not one of them. However, he said he would do what he could to have that arranged if he made it to heaven first.
One persons story held a hint of how this type of thing actually might happen. He was told that our gifting here on earth was simply a training ground for what our purpose would be in heaven. For example: those that built houses here, would be doing something similar in heaven ...only on a more majestic scale. That said, I could vision a heavenly carpenter building my lovely cabin next to the sea.
I am not sure how things will be in heaven. But, like waiting for the coming of the first snow, my anticipation of entering my heavenly home has been piqued. This one thing I do know. Whether my home in heaven is a cabin by the ocean or another dwelling of God's choosing, it will be the perfect one for me. ...and I can't wait to see it!!!
As a child living in Kansas, I used to love the night before a big snow. The smell of snow in the air, forecast frosty, white flakes of whimsical enchantment. Knowing that school would be let out the next day just added to the excitement. That feeling of childhood wonderment was relived this week as the grandchildren gathered around the TV...listening to the weather man tell which counties would be getting enough snow to guarantee the dismissal of classes the next day.
Recently, I felt that same feeling of anticipation. I was reading a book about near death experiences. Story after story was told about those who had been ushered through what they thought to be the gates of heaven. Each experience was different of course, but in many ways very much the same. Often friends or relatives came to meet the almost dying person and showed them different things that had held real meaning. After a short tour, each person was then told it was not their time and they must return to planet earth.
As I read, I recalled the death of my husband Dan. Before he died, we had often kidded each other about what kind of house we wanted prepared before the other arrived. I had ordered a cabin with large windows that opened out to the ocean. My husband had many good qualities, but construction was not one of them. However, he said he would do what he could to have that arranged if he made it to heaven first.
One persons story held a hint of how this type of thing actually might happen. He was told that our gifting here on earth was simply a training ground for what our purpose would be in heaven. For example: those that built houses here, would be doing something similar in heaven ...only on a more majestic scale. That said, I could vision a heavenly carpenter building my lovely cabin next to the sea.
I am not sure how things will be in heaven. But, like waiting for the coming of the first snow, my anticipation of entering my heavenly home has been piqued. This one thing I do know. Whether my home in heaven is a cabin by the ocean or another dwelling of God's choosing, it will be the perfect one for me. ...and I can't wait to see it!!!
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